kaso:
If Tom Cruise was injured, he’d be Tom Bruise.
if Tom Cruise was a painter he’d be Tom Hues
If Tom Cruise had a twin they’d be Tom Two’s.
If Tom Cruise ran a monopoly over convincing people that quality shoes were being sent to Africa with each first-world purchase, he’d be Toms Shoes.
^OH SHIT
If Tom Cruise made beer, he’d be Tom Brews.
if Tom Cruise was sad, he’d be Tom Blues.
if Tom Cruise solved mysteries by piecing together evidence, he’d be Tom Clues.
if Tom Cruise ran a newspaper, he’s be Tom News.
If Tom Cruise carried an electrical charge he’d be Tom Fuse.
If Tom Cruise were a row of stables, he’d be Tom Mews.
If Tom Cruise were church furniture, he’d be Tom Pews.
If Tom Cruise never won, he’d be Tom Lose.
If Tom Cruise were a lawyer, he’d be Tom Sues.
If Tom Cruise spent all his time in the bathroom, he’d be Tom Poos.
If Tom Cruise were a drunk, he’d be Tom Booze.
If Tom Cruise drank too much, he’d be Tom Spews.
If Tom Cruise was the lead character in The Aviator, he’d be Tom Hughes.
If Tom Cruise couldn’t walk straight, he’d be Tom Skews.
If Tom Cruise owned a fast food chain, he’d be Tom Drive-Thurs.
If Tom Cruise had a mother named Kanga, he’d be Tom Roos.
If Tom Cruise was really into scrap booking, he’d be Tom Glues.
If Tom Cruise went boating, he’d be Tom Canoes.
If Tom Cruise had a large collection of animals, he’d be Tom Zoos.
If Tom Cruise was featured in Greek Mythology, he’d be Tom Muse.
If Tom Cruise wore a red suit and delivered toys, he’d be Santa Cruz.
(Source: forthehive)
